Breaking news! Big Bronx Announces: No Babycakes.

Extending his classic bait-and-switch from the VassaRR of offering Babycakes to everyone and only giving them to his special buddies, Director of Forensics J O'Cruz of the Highly Bronxed School of Science ("Number One in NYC Bowling Since 1947!") has announced that Babycakes, which have never been offered at the New York City Invitational, will not be offered again in 2009. "We understand that this is disappointing news for a handful of people who think that we exist merely to feed their fat faces," O'C explained, "but that's just the way it is." To cover the cost of not supplying Babycakes, registration fees have been increased across the board by 10%. "We were also not going to offer pasty bagels and cold coffee, but not offering them would have added another 10% to the fees, which we felt was unwarranted." At the mention of the word "unwarranted," Professor O'Cruz's entire team demanded that he point to the bright line and that he use their standard for weighing, but since there were no Babycakes to weigh in the first place, he took the low point win and headed off into the sunset.