These headlines are all real, directly copied from our RSS feed without editing. When we say we didn't read them, we mean it. They didn't exactly pull us in, for some reason...
TURN YOURSELF INTO A PLAGUE
Lady Gaga Vomits Onstage in Barcelona
Tobacco enemas for everyone!
When Did Military Hats Get So Boring?
Jews Not Keen On Neo-Nazis: Science
Roach-Eating Contest Ends With Winner's Terrible Death
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