Am I the only one...

...whose immediate thought yesterday was, "Great; now Michael can dedicate himself to the search for the real molesters"?

Over the weekend I updated the Hen Hud rules, a holdover from the meeting way back when with the speechifiers. They were mostly interested in internal stuff, such as how many tournaments you need to attend and issues like that, which has never been much of a deal on the debate side. The only thing I've ever really held out for is that you can't judge if you don't debate. There have been occasional rollovers who sort of want to lord it over younger kids, which strikes me as a bit of a crock. I certainly have had students who have given up debating but still judge, like Burgers or Ben or Sarah, but they've maintained their connection to the team by attending meetings and shown a willingness to pitch in where needed. What bugs me is folks who want weekend vacations with the team who I never see any other time. That doesn't work. Still, I didn't bother including that in the rules; that's a case-by-case issue. There are some new rules, however, that you might find interesting. Dave is going over this stuff now, and it won't be official for a while, but I thought I'd give you a sneak preview.

1. No singing on the bus. Anyone caught even humming while be dropped off in Hartford.
2. No bathroom breaks in Connecticut. It takes long enough to travel route 84 without having to take bladders into consideration.
3. All debaters must learn to play Spades.
4. Roulette and craps will no longer be allowed at team meetings.
5. All discussion of postmodernism will be conducted in French, but with Canadian accents.
6. Any student caught robbing a Seven-Eleven will be suspended from the team for three days.
7. Any student who can install a wireless network in Menick's house will be allowed unlimited Seven-Eleven robberies without suspension.
8. The song title in question is "Take Me Down to the Prairie Dog City." This makes more sense than Paradise City, and is much funnier.
9. Anyone qualifying for tournaments during golf season can haul their own butts to 'em.
10. The VBD website is permanently blocked. Anyone found gaga-ing national circuit debaters will be sent to a correctional institution in Juarez for six months with no personal items except a copy of O'Cruz's Star Wars Christmas album, a jar containing Dan Bruno's burgered-to-death appendix, and a 1943 Vassar class offering guide (There's a war on, ladies!).

Otherwise, mostly it's status quo antebellum.