We here at Coachean HQ are sad to note that Camp WTF-a-Mucka has been taken over by extraterrestrials. While this comes as no surprise—nay, for some the real question is, why did it take so long—it is still dispiriting to see our students and friends and colleagues assimilated so quickly. We have long suspected that O'C is an undercover quisling for aliens, but his dispatch at selling out the camp to Vulcans, Hutts, Friends of Hutts, Nexus-6 replicants, the CFL, etc., has still taken the entire forensics community by surprise. And the copy of "To Serve Man" under his arm in the photos of him welcoming the aliens to the camp has been in dubious taste, to say the least.
Parents of students at the camp wondering how and if this will affect their own children should look for the three warning signs of alien takeover: 1) preferring to sleep in a very large pea pod at night rather than their usual beds; 2) really pointy ears (unless they already had really pointy ears before you sent them off to camp—these are debaters, after all); 3) aquisition of Tron: Legacy lunchboxes, baseball caps, tattoos, and other souvenir-like paraphernalia. If any of these symptoms are noted, a licensed exorcist should be contacted immediately.
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