Coachean Life: Bronx Funnies

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Bronx Funnies

1 comments:

Jon Cruz said...: This is really, really funny. And not too far from the truth!; 8/01/2011

Glossary

$5K: Figure O'C is paid for each WTF post
Babycakes: the patisserie that supplies the VassaRR with its tarts
BBv3.0: Big Bronx (version 3.0 in its present incarnation); formerly Big Jake (for Jonas Bronck, who for some reason hed stuck in my mind as Jacob Bronck—whatever)
Big Jake: BBv3.0 (see above)
Bigle X: The larger of two Lexington, Ma., tournaments, the other of which is known as Wee Sma' Lex
Bullpups (aka Pups): Yale students, or the Yale tournament
Catholic Charlie: Charlie Sloat, NYSFL President and NYSFL Regional Director for the Midhudson area
Caveman: "From Frenchman to Caveman," a lecture on postmodernism (see the podcast page)
Chez, the: My home, as in chez moi, pronounced "chezz moy," site of occasional small meetings; Chez HQ is the room in the chez where Little Elvis lives
CLG: Claire, former debater
Coin, the or la: A coach redux, thanks to Ridge
CP: Chris Palmer, computer god of the MFL, theoretical adult and occasional blogger
Cur, the: The meeting curriculum
DiDeAd: The Disney Debate Adventure, 2010
digressive debate: Approaches to LD that are counter to the traditional norm; referred to as progressive debate by its practitioners
DisAd13: The next WDW debate adventure, perhaps in 2013
DJ: Day Job
Doing the Bronx Benny: The definition of this phrase in unprintable
Eaters, AKA Coachean Eaters: Those who follow the Coachean Feed of debate-related articles
Emperor of Hamiltonia: Ryan Hamilton; and trust me, if you're liberal, the likelihood of your surviving more than ten minutes in this realm is really, really small
Eric the Ex-Sailor: Centurian of the Legion of Doom
ex-cruz-iating detail: Reportage from any tournament on WTF
forensician: Anyone of the forensics persuasion
Gem of Harlem: Columbia
Girl of the Streets: Maggie, we hardly knew ye!
Goy: The Joy of Tournaments; or, anyone attempting to use the JOT; or, any program imitating JOT; or, the staff of JOT; or, a random gentile
Hardware Engineer: Poor sap among the Sailors who has to get rooms, display trophies, file bus forms, etc.
Herman Melville: Special Coachean correspondent from WTF
Hillary Duff, the: The Hendrick Hudson Lincoln-Douglas Philosophical Handbook (HHLDPH, pronounced Hillary Duff)
HoraceMan, the Superhero without any Superpowers: Former debater gone to private school and private life
Juan, Kwan and the stoners: The construction team at the chez
JV: Scarswegian coach
Kathy S: Sailor's Speecho-American coach
Kaz: Newburgian coach
Kt: The daughter
Legion of Doom (AKA the Legion): The Lincoln-Douglas Educational Project (courtesy Mike Bietz)
Little Elvis: The iBook (former location of the Hunka Hunka Burnin' Love battery)
MB: Mike Bietz
MegaPod: The 60-gig iPod (replacing GrandPod, the 10-gig Gen 2)
MHL: The Metro-Hudson League, a local league for first- and second-year debaters
Modest Novice: Proposal for an annual, repeating novice topic specially chosen for new students
National $ircuit: People who can afford to travel to any tournament, anywhere, any time, and who think very highly of themselves
NatNats: NFL Finals (comparable to CatNats)
O'C: Jon Cruz, Bronx coach and debate Bon Vivant, from his Vassar email address, jocruz, which always struck me as Irish (i.e., Jon O'Cruz): for more on O'C, listen to the interview
Old Baudleroo, the: Jean Baudrillard, everyone's favorite unofficial guide to Disneyana
Panivore: She who eats only bread but debated pretty well
Panivore Junior: Her Speecho-American brother
Pffft, Pfffters: Public Forum; practitioners of Public Forum
Pip: The Wondercat, (formerly high-jumping) team mascot since 1996, deceased April 2011, still living on in the hearts of one and all
Poco: Post-contemporary, for when you've gone beyond post-modern
Polician: Practitioner of Policy Debate
progressive debate: see digressive debate
Pups: Yalies (see their mascot)
Rippin': Home of the NFL
Sailors, (aka Tars or any other nautical term): The Hen Hud team, including Termite, Peanuts, Stealth, LPW (AKA HPL), SuperSquirrel, the Panivore, et alia
Smilin' J: Centurian of the Legion of Doom
Soddie: Richard Sodikow, debate god
Speecho-Americans: Politically correct name for non-debate forensicians
Speechonauts: Speecho-Americans of the Sailor pursuasion
Taint: The taint is the part of a case containing no relevant argumentation; it comes in the middle, and is neither part of the V/C construct nor actual argumentation; in other words, 't ain't one, and 't ain't t'other one
They Who Fill Up Every Inch of the Ballot: Chetan and Kathryn; the day either of them writes only "oral" on the ballot will be the end of LD as we know it.
Tiggers: Princetonians (see their mascot)
Tik pronounced teek: Siamese cat born 2/29/06 (and acts it), based on "name T.K." (to come), stepbrother of infamous Pip the Wondercat
TRPC/E-TRPC/C-TRPC: The tabbing software for the PC, broken down into Evil (E-) TRPC, which is newer but is often serendipitous in its performance, and Classic (C-) TRPC, which has fewer bells and whistles, but admirable stability
Tyler and Tanner, AKA TnT, T&T, Menick and Cruz: Little is known about the actual Tyler and Tanner, Montwegian debaters, but just saying their names is entertaining. In the lore of Coachean Life, one of them represents Menick and the other represents Cruz, but no one is sure which is which, including Tyler, Tanner, Menick and Cruz
VassaRR: the Vassar RR, O'C's annual attempt to squeeze yet more money out of an unsuspecting debate community
VCA: Vast Coachean Army, viz., the 3 people who regularly read this blog
Vegas Elvis: the MacBook Pro that is bigger than Little Elvis, but not exactly as big as the real Elvis late in life, and which therefore cannot be called Big Elvis or Fat Elvis, which would be the natural tendency
--wegian: Native of, cf. Glaswegian as native of Glascow; e.g. Scarswegian (native of Scarsdale), Montwegian (native of Monticello), Lexwegian (native of Lexington, either Ky or Ma)
WTF (also PCP, DOA, DMV, etc): VBD, represented by pretty much any three-letter acronym other than VCA or CLG (see above)
Wunn and Only: Rippin' Scott