Is there anyone who didn't see this coming?

Hiya Honey,

Jon Cruz, although not a millionaire, manages to live like one: Just look at his Foursquare check-ins. He is also not a politician, although he has supported many people who are politicians who would be better off working at Walmarts, and outside the little niche he has carved for himself and filled with many others, much in the same way he has filled his apartment with George Lucas memorabilia that even George Lucas cringes over, he is not famous at all; yet, he is one of the one of the most important men in New York City. Okay, maybe not New York City exactly. He is one of the one of the most important men in the Bronx, which is part of New York City, much in the same way that the Black Hole is part of Calcutta. He is the coach of the Bronx Science HS The Bronx High School of Science (get the damned name right, will you?) Debate Team.

Every day he gives up whatever time he isn’t lounging around at Japonica to help his students form their own opinions (or other people’s opinions, if they occur to him first), grow as citizens (except for the ones who are foreigners) and as people (except for the ones who aren’t people). He runs the largest debate team in the country, spending countless hours entering NFL points and explaining to bus drivers that Boston is west of the Hudson River, raising funds for it so that everybody at our diverse public school is able to compete across the nation so that he can spend even more hours entering NFL points. He memorizes everybody’s first name after he meets them and sometimes even before he meets them or, if possible, instead of meeting them, and will remember them for the rest of his life or at least until he has to register them for a local tournament, in which case he calls them Unnamed Novice Ninety-Two or whatever. Come to think of it, what he calls them is The Bronx High School of Science Unnamed Novice Ninety-Two or whatever. Perish the thought that you just call the place Bronx Science.

What makes him so memorable? I can’t remember.

Oh, yeah. Right. He is a fabulous, unapologetic, Jewish gay man—What??? Wait a minute!!! O'C is gay??? You learn something new every day. He a model for so many students who came out to him first for help. The staff of Japonica, the conductors of the D train both a.m. and p.m., the flight crew on his last flight on JetBlue and the entire Slovenian National Marching Polka Band have also come out to him. His style is inspired with equal parts of George Takei…and…uh…Walter Mondale, and Liberace (You know, sometimes just saying George Takei is enough, whatever the context.) He can tell you the best place for sushi in Soho even though he’s never been there because perish the thought that he ever eat anywhere but Japonica, pizza in Midtown (as if—he hasn’t been to Midtown since they closed the play “Starlight Express”), and gumbo in Georgia (in his view, any place that takes Emory keys as negotiable currency). But most of all, no person could ever do what he does—not even him—at least not with the same enthusiasm and care which he does it.

Sincerely,
The Bronx Science HS Debate Team The Bronx High School of Science (they can’t even get the damned name right in the signature: he’ll be on them for that, mark my words)