I spent all last night filling out bloody cards for Districts. They still need codes, but I'll do that Friday morning. I need a break. A little of Zephs' duck confit, perhaps... Maybe I'll see you there tonight!
Judging is going to be a bear this weekend. We have at best the bare minimum. Joe V managed to scare up a few neutrals, but everyone seems to have other plans or lives or something, and all the dangling of money has done nothing for us. I mean, how else do ex-debaters make money in college without having to do any work? Who is our competition, anyhow? Oh, well, what are you going to do? Jersey is also having its districts, with the same problem, so at least we're not alone. Maybe everybody's at spring break or something, which always scares the hell of me. The last thing I want to think about is debaters gone wild. Thousands of policy geeks and LD nerds actually venturing out into the sun. Could we even recognize them without their pallor? Speecho-Americans, on the other hand, well, it's always spring break for them, isn't it? Anyhow, no judges means wheel out your parents. That's what they're there for. Any wonder why I worry about LD and the old handbasket? Do the math. If parents and coaches judge districts, finals comprise debaters who've won ballots from coaches and parents. Versus if pomo majors judge districts.
Quick. Define legitimate. (Unless you're a Jolly Tar. In which case, quick, spell legitimate.)
Some day I would like to go to NFL finals. When I'm unemployed, that is. I can't imagine giving up a whole week of work/vacation now, but if I was already looking for ways to fill the empty hours other than shopping for the best bargain in egg-slicers as retirees tend to do, I'd be there in a heartbeat. I'd love to go to the district chairman meeting: that HAS to be the most exciting group of Americans since last year's Eeyore look-alike contest. Then there's the extra-curricular events. O'C's guided tour of Cinderella's castle. Getting thrown out of the casinos with the Nostrumite. Climbing the Eiffel Tower with CLG. Of course, usually the tournaments aren't in Orlando or Vegas or Paris (although, let's face it, there is an Eiffel Tower in each of them), but in West Whoopee Cushion, Arkansas, so maybe I'm expecting too much. The thing is, I'm always pissed that we can't go ride the Beast when we go the TOCs, but they're only open while we're debating; weekends only. I'd go early for a really top of the line wooden coaster. Not to mention Son of the Beast... If I knew in advance I wasn't judging all day, I'd dump all of you and head north and line up.
The next time you hear from me, my season will be officially over, except for TOCs and a couple of final meetings. I'm putting the golf clubs into the car as soon as I get rid of the districts trophies. If you want me, you'll find me in the woods, looking for my ball. But don't worry. I'll no doubt keep blogging. Having nothing to say has never stopped me in the past, so why would that make any difference now?
No comments:
Post a Comment